Intro: G C G C Am D 

G                        Em 
I am a blank page in a notebook, 
                C                                Am  D 
waiting to be filled with countless drawings of cocks. 
          G                     Em   
I am a bathroom wall, freshly painted over 
     C                                      Am                    D  
to cover up swastikas and the names of the girls that we called sluts, 
          C 
I am the Total Gym, 
          D 
I am the Salad Glove, 
          G 
I am the Slap Chop, 
     D           Em   Sean does a hammer on on the A string                 
I'm the forever lazy, 
         C                   Am          D            G Another hammer on A string 
I am a boring and worthless thing, and nobody should save me. 

          G                      Em 
I am the Kool-Aid stains on the mouth of a kid, 
       C                   Am   D 
whose name is most likely Cody. 
          G                               Em                     C                        Am  D 
He had a juice box for breakfast and he carries a stick that he most likely found in the alley, 
           C 
And Cody doesn't have friends, 
          D 
and his parents hate each other, 
                 G             D                Em   Sean hammer ons the A string at one point 
and he wants to find a better way to love his family. 
            C                           Am       D               G     Another hammer on the A string 
And after school he hangs out in the abandoned house behind the Arby's. 


G C G C Am D 

           G           Em 
I am the camera that watches you, 
      C                 Am   D 
when you think you are awake. 
             G              Em 
and I am a Jesus fish on a drug traffic fan 
       C                      Am  D 
that keeps all their cocaine safe. 
          C                           D 
I am the guy that eats at least 50 chicken wings, 
       G           D    Em  hammer on like last time 
at an all you can eat buffet, 
         C                     Am      D       G   same hammer on 
I'm the Xbox controller for a drone operator today. 

             G            Em 
And I'm a hologram of a tanning booth, 
        C                     Am   D 
in a history class from the future. 
          G                     Em 
I'm the nuclear test, called Operation Dominic, 
      C                    Am   D 
that gave my grandfather cancer. 

             C                       D 
And I am a video store clerk and an angel of death, 
         G           D        Em     Guess what! Hammer on! 
"Hi how are you? My name is Trevor." 
            C 
Prepare to die, 
C             Am          D             G  Haaammmmerrrr on! 
Bad Lieutenant 2 is the greatest movie ever.